sometimes the hurt cut so deep
it's no longer abt forgiving
it's abt forgetting
even if i forgive, i still can't forget
i am not angry
just very sad
tt anyone would say those words to me
i cannot forget
it hurts so much
i must have hurt u so much that ur words now seem to be so spiteful towards me
onto happier things
the coming weeks are more hectic
esp during the weekends
with mentor grp outing and A10 n A11 outing and what-nots
the upcoming dnd as well
i am turning 22 in 3 days!
scary!
when i saw the 4 candles on the cake, i wanted to say hey i thot i was only 21
sighz
the wish to be forever 21 has to be forsaken alr
today we surprised rina in church with a small slice of cake for her bdae
hahs
anw there are talks of going desaru/bintan or anywhere nearby in late nov
hopefully it works out!
daddy calls us the gals gang
ahhas
today is a simple and happy day!
met nana at asian kitchen at ion
we shared all the dishes like the ru rou fan, osyter mee suan, oyster omelette, glutinous rice and duck popiah!
yummies!
and i treated them to drinks as a starting work treat
cox i haven treated them though i alr worked for so long
hahas
they surprised me with my first bdae cake for this year!
hahs :)
thanks babes!
i love that no matter how unfrequently we meet up, we still can talk and catch up from where we last left off
a pity that everyone is so busy nowadays that we have to squeeze time out from each other's busy schedules to meet
after that when they all went off to meet their various appointments
i went to far east plaza to satisfy my shopping crave
hahas
been wanting to get clothes
and every time the shopping trip alwys ended up as a dinner and chatting session
hahas so i decided to go on a shopping spree on my own
visited almost every shop in far east plaza in 2 hrs!
bought 2 dresses for work, though they are quite casual
it's funny how retail therapy heals u
makes u feel alot happier than u first started off
shopping alone can be lonely
but it is really efficient hahas
today is the first day of my official job!!!
the company only has 3 employees!
which totally says how small the firm is
cox i tink it's a branch, its HQ is at Geneva
only me and a A11 at client's place for this week
the senior brought us there n intro us to the accountant then left le
so i got half the workpapers to complete within the week
got to plan my own time and finish them in time
ahhh a bit stressed!
but luckily the job is very small
so shld be relatively easier
i really tink i can be quite a workaholic
am one who really wan to finish what i started on
to me, everything is relatively interesting n exciting for now
so hopefully this passion will keep burning so that i wun be bored out of the job
and find work a chore so soon
jiayous!!
this week am at raffles place uob plaza!
so am trying to ask raffles place ppl out for lunch!
since i am seldom in tt area
ahas
today is really slack!!
we went for this super atas lunch today
cox the senior managers came to client's place and brought us out
for dimsum lunch
the dim sum is really superb!
we ate till we are so so full!
it was at east ocean restaurant
each "long" of dimsum costs like 5 bucks!
but really v nice!!
our total bill came up to a shocking $495+ for 13 ppl!
but anw it's charged to client la
hahas
:X
then for dinner the gals went out for tampopo at taka!
the ramen is so nice! and the soup is tasty too
the mocha cake we ate is qt interesting, not too sweet
:)
the guys were qt bored with us cox there were like 7 gals n 2 guys
then they had to watch us while we shopped at joop and moonriver
hahas
so we ended at macs for chit-chat session till 11 plus
woooo i wan go shopping!!! i din manage to get anyth today
cox we felt bad making the guys wait for us
moonriver n joop both got sales!
:)
happy day of eating lots of good food!!!
really sinful though!
realised tt now tt i am working
i am more willing to spend on food and clothes for myself
maybe cox keep thinking that i must reward myself for my hard work
hahas
but the truth is i haven even worked very hard yet
next week will be at addax asia!
shld be at uob plaza (raffles place)
heard it's a really small job
my snr say the company only got 1 person
so weird
hmmm....
anw hope the A11 and snr i will be working with will be nice
all girls team!
today was a good day till 530pm
sighz
my manager and seniors are normally nice
but today i felt they were being sarcastic to me
was qt disappointed
it was as if i had this idealistic imagination of them
but it was my fault really
i did this particular working paper and i relied mainly on prior year working paper
so i copied some of the documentation without checking if it is true for current year
and not really understanding the reason behind the documentation before doing it
so when my manager review my work, he reminded me not to totally rely on prior year work
must understand alr then document
that happened in the morn
which i am totally ok with it
what happened at 530pm was qt a hit to me
cox i felt really lousy
my snr kinda sarcastically teased me
cox i completed a workpaper w/o changing the name of the person we got the info from
cox the person has alr left the company
so he asked me so how was xx (the name of the person that i document as the person i got the doc from, when act he alr left the company)
i was like huh?
but the thing was the documents were given to me by another snr
so of cox i wun noe who the documents were from, much less document the new person's name
felt so yuan wang
but then agn i also din go n ask who were they from
so once agn
i relied too much on prior yr working paper
but i felt really qt emo!
felt like i am not meticulous enuff
did not check thru my work enuff
act i am nt really angry with them
just really upset with myself
they did comfort me in the end
saying that i was not in the wrong
since i only jus started on the job
and the documents were in fact given to me by my snr and not requested from the client personally by me
so of cox i wun noe the name
and of cox as A10 level, i will most of the time rely on prior yr work paper n copy n paste
but i am determined to change and be more careful!!!
must read and understand before i do my work
i realised i am always very careless and impulsive
do finish alr, always nv check, then quickly send back to snr for review
bad habit!
:(
but then my manager is weird too
he says cox we still on training
so no need to stay back late
everyday can go home at 530pm
then when i came up at 515pm to pack my stuff to get ready to go home
he used a sarcastic tone to say that i purposely come up early to prepare to go home
shld expect that in the audit line that we must always stay back late
the thing is this is not even my main job!
i am just helping out for 2 weeks only
and he himself instructed us not to stay late
arghhhhh
learnt qt abit abt office politics too
it's qt scary
how ppl talk behind other ppl's backs
decided to keep my ears closed and keep my mouth shut
so i pretended not to hear them speak abt others
then in the end manager sarcastically said
so u cannot multi-task isit? cox u like nv hear what we say
i said i can ah
but it's better not to know too much
i tink i was qt sarcastic too
sighz
so gonna die
ahhhhh!
:(
emo day
luckily for suez's bdae celeb at mache!
escape reality for a while
make me have sth to look forward to the entire day
really cheered me alot
:)
sighz dreading work alr...
today muffins went to jb!
it was really fun!
really an effective way of escaping reality for a day!
afterwhich it's back to our studies or work for us
we went kenny rogers for lunch
followed by shopping
then kbox
and dinner at atas restaurant for seafood!
iterniary packed to the max
super duper tired now!
:)
i love short weekend getaways
a pity we din stay over
next time then!
work last week was quite xiong
maybe not used to the tests of details and stuff
alot of sampling and documents to check against
but wat tires me out the most
is requesting for documents from the clients
will feel quite bad to disturb them to ask them stuff and yet also have to accomodate their schedule
it irritates me cox i have to walk all around the company looking for ppl
i get directed from place to place cox ppl do not know who is handling what
and thus duno who i can get the documents from
it really slows down my work
and i spend the entire day doin nth but walking ard talkin to ppl
and the ppl get irritated cox they are obliged to help us yet unwilling to do so cox it requires too much of them
no wonder everyone tinks we're pests
not like we love being pests in the first place
sighz
no wonder my manager says client relations are very impt
if we learn to treat the client well and get along well with them,
getting documents will be alot easier
i miss stayin in office
office work sudd seems more relaxing
ahhas
no need to kan ren jia de lian se
i start to think i am horrible to my shoes
i always need to get new shoes, regardless flats or heels
cox they always spoil after a while
so almost every month i get at least 1 pair of new shoes
oh gosh my spending really increase by alot since school days
nvm can comfort myself by thinking it as when peak period starts, maybe i wun have time to buy stuff
so now can lavish on myself abit more
hahas
:P
i love new shoes!!!
they totally cheer u up!
woooo feel so loved
lotsa ppl congratuating me!
hahas
prob cox they are so shocked that i can pass
anw i found mummy prayed for me yest
so sweet!
*touched*
love her to bits!
:)
today was busy!
finally i understood why we need to take the mas regulations test
today i really had to apply them
when testing the compliance
hahas
yays!
with god's grace, I passed my manual driving test on 1st try!
woohoo!
was super scared before that
but i tink the last revision lesson this morn really helped alot
my instructor really answered all my qns patiently
he kept saying i could drive but just that i am super not confident at all!
i tink my lord knows my heart and really understands me!
yest was doing my quiet time and this phrase popped up
Isaiah 35:4
Say to those with fearful hearts,
"Be strong, do not fear,
your God will come."
this really reassured me
i said a quick prayer before i went for the test
and though i was super nervous still
i tink i felt this peace, like everything is left to the lord
i told him, whether i pass or fail, i will leave it to ur will
anw i did many stupid mistakes
to get demerit points of 10
like rolling abit backwards on slope cox i pulled my handbrake too slowly,
stalled like a couple of times
fail to release handbrake before moving off
then turning steering wheel while stationery
but i tink i am really lucky to even pass at all!!!!
thank god!
anw still duno if i will have the courage to actually drive on the roads
but am really really happy now!
:)
the next 2 weeks i will be at UOB kay hian!
newton!
so much nearer to home
yays!
you alone are my heart's desire
and i long to worship you
:)
went for the work forum after cep today
it was really interesting to hear abt how others' jobs and work experiences are
even found out tt there is this guy who works at PWC for 4 yrs alr
realised that god is sovereign
that utimately everything is in his plan
we will just have to seek him and do our best in our job, glorifying him in every way possible
cox...
I am part-time auditor and full-time christian!!
finally went to the doc after work yest
got tons of medicine
i tink it's enuff to kill me just by eating them
-_-
i remembered why i gave up
it was too tiring to be understanding or even try to understand any reasons behind certain words or actions
freedom gives u the free will to do whatever u like and say whatever u please
and hence it makes u accountable for only ur own words n actions
maybe that is why only u alone will understand the reasons behind ur own words n actions
i dun blame anyone
because it's the path i chose
i just need to learn to focus less on u
and more on myself
cox i wan to get well and be healthy!
yest nite was bad!
came home tired and hungry
but can't eat much cox
every gulp seems like a sharp object being prodded down my throat
having a very bad sorethroat
i tink tt is the reason that is causing my fever to not subside
parental units tink it is the result of eating too many mooncakes :(
TGIF!
i need plenty of comfort and love from my bed!
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